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Excuses or Expansion?


Wowza! I have not blogged in over a month. Time to bust out of this writer’s block. Time management and balance are two things that I will have to work on forever!  Having a family often interferes with the rigid structure I would like to have planned for myself. My to-do list may have 10 items on it and sometimes accomplishing 3 is a stretch! Things like injuries, ear infections, and teething toddlers dictate how a day will be spent. Yesterday was one of those days. The teething toddler has been up every 2 hours for several days. My normally patient, easy going guy was accident prone, whiney, inconsolable, and exhausting to the parental units. By 6:30pm I was in my own sort of meltdown mode. So much so, that I had to have a cry at the beach.

Tears always make me feel weak. I have never liked to cry or been much of a crier. My husband is a softy who will tear up at the slightest thing, so I have been working to take on some of his softness. Tears are not a weakness, they are a release. Learning to have compassion for myself, loving myself, and nurturing myself are things that are at the forefront of my inner work. The beach is a good place for me to have these moments.

Moving to Florida and having an ocean at my discretion was something I never quite planned for, however, it was a wonderful change for our family. The ocean represents expansiveness, constant change, ebb and flow. As you can see, there are many metaphors linked to the ocean.  As soon as my feet hit the sand, I can breathe deeply. Occasionally, I will take that deep inhale and realize that my breath has been constricted most of the day. I will look out at the horizon and my eyes will soften to take in the view. Tension also often resides in our eyes. Eyes will bulge forward in their sockets, preventing us from living in a relaxed mental state. For me, the ocean is a quick fix to facilitate a deeper state of relaxation, and often release.

I have learned that crying is not a sign of weakness, and allowing tears to flow is less damaging than bottling up the emotions and creating all sorts of tension patterns in the body that can lead to pain; both physical and emotional. My tears flow less than 5 minutes and can have a lasting healing effect for weeks or even months! A quote I have held close to my heart is  “you can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf” by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Surfing our emotional waves and working to maintain balance is a huge key to life and one that I am reminded of on those days when I make time to visit the ocean.

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